Sad, Caffeinated Sheep

Sigh...I don't even know where to begin on this one. As you may or may not know, I have been employed at Starbucks for the past 3 years (hey man, I'm a student, and it pays the bills). So last night, we had this corporate-wide meeting in which every retail store closed its doors at 5:30 PM to re-train baristas and go back to basics. I am not going to discuss what went on at the meeting, simply because it was completely boring. But anyways...I am thoroughly SICKENED at the fact that this THREE HOUR store closure made national headline news for DAYS. DAYS. Last I checked, we are in the middle of a war. On the brink of a major recession. In the midst of the most significant presidential election in decades. But forget that, forget that people are dying or that crude oil just hit $100 a barrel...WHAT WILL I DO WITHOUT MY FRAPPUCCINO?!?
I almost didn't post this, because for a while I was at a loss for words. This clip from Fox and Friends (deathhhh) is a good example of people's sheer idiocy as a whole, but specifically this circumstance. Can we just focus for a second? First off, that woman, who is not even important enough for me to try and know her name, should be roundhouse kicked in the jaw every hour on the hour for the rest of her horse-faced life. Secondly, how is this important news? Are people so mindless and consumer-driven by the prestige of a green logo on a cup of coffee that they are really, LEGITIMATELY upset that they may have to (GASP), go somewhere else? Or, even WORSE, forego their evening fatty drink? I am utterly distraught by people's reactions. It's coffee. It's not THAT good...and that's saying a lot, cuz I freakin' LOVE coffee. You know what's fun? Brewing your own shit at home if your jones is that bad. Or just save yourself the $4.35 for the night...donate to some bum sitting outside that closed Starbucks watching you desperately pull on the door with a look on your face like someone just killed your puppy and ran off with your lover. I say it at least once a day at work, that people are sheep, and this completely saddening display only furthers that notion. Ugh.